The Mirror

The "Mirror" is described as seeing ourselves or reflections of our lives in others around us. It can be a situation were you have been struggling with your boss because you are a good employee, work hard but your boss won't give you a raise. You feel like your boss is holding back on you and does not appreciate you. You make a connection with someone who is a "boss" who confides in you that she is really struggling because she has a employee that she really admires and appreciates but she has not been able to reward her financially because the gas prices keep going up and it's effecting every area of the business. She states that she tried to tell her recently when asked for a raise that she was a valued employee but she does not think she believed her and fears she will lose her.

The "Mirror" helps us to see another persons point of view which we can often miss when we are focused on our own emotions. Be willing to look in the Mirror it may help you to see life from a different prospective.

Is Your Job Killing You?

Stress in the work place is clear to anyone who is working. We don't need researchers to tell us that! Stress and anxiety cause physical consequences. Prolonged anxiety leads to heart problems not to mention the feelings that are associated with stress and anxiety - fear, irritability, difficulty sleeping, shaky...the list goes on.

Read more about the 5 causes of stress on the job - Job Insecurity, Poor Nutrition, Sleep Disturbance, Success and Lack of control at Is Your Job Killing You?

We have been trained in special stress management techniques. Contact US!

Creating a Life Worth Living

I was at a conference the other day and the speaker spoke about, "creating a life worth living". What about at this moment, "Is life worth living? " I have pondered this question. Is this a judgemental question? There is this paradox that I would like to acknowledge. Acceptance for what our life is like and who we are in the moment, without judgement, and acceptance of what it could be! Freedom from our own current suffering requires acceptance deep within our being. If you are struggling with this concept, "Fake it 'til you make it." Life IS worth living at this moment. Accept the moment but realize too, we have potential to strive for much more.

Perfectionism

Perfectionism - a disposition to regard anything short of perfection as unacceptable.

Most times people talk about being perfect or a perfectionist in a positive vein. Performing accurately, having perfect scores, being a perfect shot, settling for nothing less than perfection are all frequently quoted phrases that clearly regard perfectionism as a very desirable personal trait. Often times, people are even punished when they are not perfect as well as generously reinforced when they are. Our society generally promotes and rewards people that strive toward perfection and equally discredits or disregards individuals that “fail” to attain that standard. It is interesting that something so widely and universally viewed as a positive human behavior could also be filled with many negative psychological consequences.

In a recent article in Clinical Psychiatry News, a study was designed to assess the relationship between Perfectionism and Social Phobia. Findings suggested that individuals with elevated scores on a Self-Critical Perfectionism scale also had predictably higher scores on a depression rating scale. Also, individuals suffering from both depression and social phobia categorically demonstrated higher scale elevations in the measure of perfectionism. This studies “results demonstrate the validity of the new perfectionism scales in identifying maladaptive aspects of perfectionism in a clinical sample”. For more information view this article on Perfectionism or visit Contact Us for a FREE consultation on how to understand and cope with these traits in yourself.

Love and relationship

Valentine’s Day brings our thoughts to validating the relationships we have in our lives. Often we express our feelings through giving cards, candy, dinners, etc. Many of us have ideas about what is important in a healthy relationship. It seems that relationships are what create the most happiness in our lives as well as the most struggles. For those who have lost a loved one to death, divorce or for other reasons or have discontent in your relationships, this can be a difficult time. We can give you the tools you need to get through these difficult times. Contact Us!

Inspiration from Martin Luther King, Jr.

In Honor of Black History Month...

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

Martin Luther King Jr.,
1963- US black civil rights leader & clergyman (1929 - 1968)

Parents have Significantly Higher Levels of Depression

A study by Florida State University professor Robin Simon and Vanderbilt University's Ranae Evenson found that parents have significantly higher levels of depression than adults who do not have children. Even more surprising, the symptoms of depression do not go away when the kids grow up and move out of the house.

What does this mean for parents? The study indicates that this does NOT mean there are no benefits to parents but that parents tend to worry more and realistically they have more to worry about. The value of a study like this is that it presents a realistic view of the difficulties associated with parenthood and encourages parents to seek greater social and emotional support. Click the link above for more detailed information on the study.
Contact Us! We are licensed professionals and we can help. FREE Initial Consultation.

Despair to Hope

Despair to Hope

The artist, Tim Sabados depicts the journey from despair to hope. View his website for more information. Contact Us for a FREE consultation. There IS hope.

Laughter as Medicine

Laughter is a good way to let go. Sometimes, we can take life too seriously. We become frantic, worried, fearful, sad or angry. Usually, what we are experiencing at any given time in our lives is just a drop in the ocean. It is just a dot of the whole picture.

A clown is like an aspirin, only he works twice as fast.
- Groucho Marx

Medical studies indicate that laughter boosts levels of endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, and suppresses levels of epinephrine, the stress hormone.

So, laugh! Watch a good funny movie! Move those stomach muscles! Lighten up. One thing for sure about life is that it is always changing and we have the ability to impact the direction of our lives. Contact Us.

Chance or Choice?

Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved. -William Jennings Bryan

Where are you going? Does it seem you are headed for a train wreck and you see it coming but you feel powerless to do anything about it?! That it's all out of your control!

We can help you recognize your inherent power to take control of your life.

Let's Talk. Contact Us!

It Happens

Every day all of us are subjected to events, internal and external, that result in demands on us. Events range from major physical or emotional traumas to the less dramatic or more routine challenges. Most of us are affected, to a greater or lesser extent, by both personal and social events and circumstances. The manner in which we respond or cope with these challenges varies from person to person as do the outcomes of our efforts. Some coping strategies would be considered effective and healthy while others are viewed as self-destructive. A person’s insight or awareness into the stressors in their life as well as which coping strategies they turn to is key to becoming a healthier individual.

Another term for a person’s ability to manage or handle life’s stress and struggle is resiliency. View How Well Do You Bounce Back and complete the brief resiliency screening checklist; this may provide you some feedback about your coping strengths as well as areas where your resiliency abilities can improve.

Talk Not Always Cheap

The old saying, “talk is cheap” has its merit when referring to how some people are all talk and no action. Others become skeptical of those folks and often come to discount what comes out of their mouths. But there are instances when talk alone can be an effective and powerful personal coping tool; we are referring here to “self-talk”.

Self-talk is the internal thoughts that all individuals experience everyday of our lives. Self-talk can be equally positive as it can be self-destructive. When we stop and reflect on the types of self messages we replay in our minds, we often find patterns and themes about how we perceive ourselves, view others and about our opinions of the world around us. Our perceptions and the meanings we attach to current and past events, people, our values and ourselves are all powerfully shaped and reinforced by our self-talk. Personal efforts to promote positive self-talk will produce a more self-satisfying outcome. Cognitive Behavioral therapists assist people with identifying, analyzing and modifying these automatic thoughts. This form of therapy has proven to produce effective changes in personal attitudes, feelings and actions. So talk is not always cheap, in the case of self-improvement it can be one of our most value tools. Learn more by reading, Thinking Positively

Free Consultation

The initial consultation with us is FREE!!!! We realize how difficult it can be to make that first step and we want it make it easy for you.

What a Parent of a Teenager Needs...

Are you a parent of a teen? Have you felt confused, lost, angry, and out of control? Parenting a teen can be a very difficult task. Your teen may be testing every limit and rule of your household, rejecting, angry, selfish and just plain hateful or sad, depressed, withdrawn and sullen. Did I say selfish? As a parent you are trying to care for them, you have their best interest at heart but it feels like you are going nowhere. As teens our children push and pull and we push and pull. This action and reaction appears very similar to the birthing process, birthing a child into an adult. When it’s all over the pain is forgotten and the joy of completion and hopefully a healthy adult allows us to let go and forget the pains of the birthing process.

Parents are often so very focused on parenting that they forget to care for themselves. You are not alone in this struggle with your teen. Generally, this is a natural process of human development. How can you as a parent flourish during these tumultuous times? Stay connected to your teen and other parents of teens or parents who have parented teens in the past. They have much wisdom to share. Read information from credible sources about this developmental stage and parenting. DON’T take their anger, insults, etc personally. Their pushing may feel terrible and your first reaction may be to want to push back. Stand still in unconditional acceptance. DON"T hesitate to get the support that YOU need. We can help. Contact Us.

About Three Quarters of Health Care Spending...

Is now on people with chronic conditions. Our health care delivery systems are becoming being more and more complicated. Dual enrollees (Medicare and Medicaid) with Medicare Part D are struggling to receive the medications that they need to take care of very serious and chronic illnesses. Some states have stepped in to make sure consumers are receiving the medications that are vital to them.

What can we do? As individuals it seems like we have little control over these bigger systems. We can make changes in our lifestyles. We can educate ourselves on prevention and taking care of ourselves. We can stay healthy, eat right, exercise our bodies and our minds, learn stress coping skills, and stress reduction skills. There will be less need for health care systems in your life.

Treatment for Anxiety

Breathe......Breathe......Breathe.......
Breathe.....Breathe......Breathe.....

One Man's Medicine is another Man's Poison

As is the case with most things, too much of a good thing can become unhealthy. In the case of prescription medications for the treatment of Attention Deficit Disorder and other impulse-control disorders, medications like Ritalin, Metadate, Strattera and Adderall have become popular and effective in the treatment of these disorders. These amphetamine-derived substances have a paradoxical or opposite effect on people that truly suffer from attention and impulse control deficits, acting to calm, focus and regulate their hyperactive behaviors and attention to tasks. When used responsibly many individuals are able to function more effectively and productively in their work, school and relationships.

On the other hand, when medications such as these are inappropriately used, taken to achieve the true amphetamine response, it can become dangerous and contribute to a more habitual pattern of substance abuse. View this recent article with regard to Adderall in particular and the phenomenon occurring on some college campuses. Prescription for Abuse

Feeding the Predator with Negative Thought Patterns

Who and what are you feeding? What are you giving energy to? If you are thinking about fears, anxieties, weakness, insecurities and self-hatred than you are feeding the "predator.

What is a predator? "An organism that lives by preying on other organisms."

This entity has a mind of it's own to feed and devour as much energy and attack the host carrier. These negative thought processes of self-hatred, guilt, weakness, anxiety, separateness and fears are eating you alive so to speak. Starving the Predator of the mind will give you back the power and energy to serve your highest purpose.

Traits Increase Depression for Women

Many and most of us experience periods of depression during our lifetime. Some experience depression to a degree that they can benefit from counseling and/or medication therapies while others experience depression on a milder level and are able to “bounce back” quickly without much interference in their day to day routines.

With more specific attention to gender and depression, recent findings from a University of Michigan study on gender differences and depression indicates that when men and women are compared, women experience depression more than men. Trapped in Reflection

A healthy response to depression can be consulting with a mental health counselor to assess the severity of your depression and offer ideas for improving your coping.